Melomaniac
DESCRIBE YOURSELF IN 3 SONGS AND EXPLAIN :
Before I Dive In, Let Me Pimp My Playlist! It’s About To Be Extremely Hard To Narrow Myself Down To Three Songs. However, I’ve Created Several Playlists With Songs That Almost Perfectly Describe Myself, My Energy, My Emotions, My Love, Every Facet Of Me. Just Search For ‘Deej’ On Apple Music & Spotify and Follow Me!
Intro X Kehlani (Spoken Word Piece By Reyna Biddy) – SweetSexySavage Album
For Whatever Reason, I Get Plenty Of Flack For Being Such A Die Hard Kehlani Fan. Once Again, Kehlani Is An Artist That Speaks To Me And For Me. Not To Mention She’s My Good Taurus Sis Who’s Birthday Is The Day After Mine. I Think It’s Safe To Say, She Gets Me. The Intro To This Album Is A Spoken Word Piece By Another Dope Ass Lady, Reyna Biddy. This Poetic Masterpiece Is A Truth Echoed By Many Women, Black Women And Women Artists About Wanting People To Understand Them Better And Not Put Them In A Box. The Jewel Being Dropped Here Is To Appreciate A Woman For Everything She Is, Flaws And All.
“The truth is, I'm a superwoman. And some days I'm an angry woman. And some days I'm a crazy woman. For still waiting, for still loving harder even if I'm aching. For still trusting that I'm still worth the most. For still searching for someone to understand me better…”
This Intro Hit Me Right In The Feels. This Album Came Out In 2017. I Was Into The Second Year Of My Relationship And Unbeknownst To Me At The Time, I Was Continuously Pouring Into My Boyfriend From A Cup That Always Emptied But Never Refilled. We…well I’ll Say I…was Transitioning Out Of The Honeymoon Phase And I Was Starting To See Some Of Those Red Flags That Ignored Early On In Our Relationship. I Was Feeling Like I Was Helping To Fix And Heal Him Yet I Wasn’t Being Heard In Return. I Wasn’t Being Poured Back Into. I Was Feeling Insane Because I Had Acknowledged That Yes, Some Days I Was Indeed Crazy And Angry. But I Was Loving Him So Fucking Hard And It Felt Like Anything Outside Of That Was Irrelevant. I Felt Like Medicine….Like As Long As He Was Getting Better, As Long As His Relationships Were Getting Better And Flourishing, Nothing Else Mattered. So To Say This Song Helped To Give Me Strength To Understand That I Was More Than Just A Fixer…more Than Just Someone Who Was Supposed To Constantly Give And Not Receive, Is An Understatement. When You Know Better, You Do Better.
Pretty Bird Freestyle X Jhene Aiko Feat. Common – Souled Out (Deluxe) Album
“A bird's persona to be free and honor, The sky, that's when you really most high. Unafraid of the unknown and now we know why…”
Pretty Bird…..Whew. This Song…is The Last Song On The Regular Version Of This Masterpiece (Yes I Said It). This Entire Album Was About Evolving Through Heartbreak (Familial & Romantic) And Coming Through To The Other Side More Enlightened, Healed, And More Learned To Life’s Lessons And Philosophies. Pretty Bird Is A Song Referring To A Woman With Given Talents, Beauty, And Personality That Is At A Very Emotional State And Is Losing Sight Of Her Goals Or Self. This Album Came Out In 2014 And Hit. But This Album Fucking Slapped (For Me) In 2018. It’s One Of My Favorite Albums Of All Time. It Represents Healing And Transition And There Are Several Points Throughout My Young Adult Life Where This Album Has Been Reflected, Relatable, And Has Helped Me Heal And Refocus Myself.
This Song Defines Me To The Tee. I’m An Empath…I Feel Things Extremely Strongly. Sometimes Too Strongly. There Are Often Points In My Life Where I Feel Caged, Where I Feel Unsure Of Myself, Unclear Of What My Purpose Is, Unsure Of How To Process The Excess Of Emotions, Unsure Of How To Feel, Unheard. I Doubt Myself And My Aura And My Abilities. I Suffer From Frequent Anxiety And Panic Attacks As Well As Manic Depression. Anytime I Feel These Things…when I Start Succumbing To That Dark Place And I Consider Giving In And Drowning…I Listen To This Song On Repeat, At Full Blast Throughout My Apartment, Light My Candles, And Prepare To Meditate.
I LIED X NICKI MINAJ – THE PINKPRINT ALBUM
“I guess this is what I gotta do to keep me from falling, Stalling the truth. Who knew what you’d do if I let you in? My mama ain't raised no fool. I, I'm not your usual typical type. Who would protect me if I never hide?
Falling so fast I'm afraid of you. So I lied…”
I Like To Call Myself An Objective Barb. I Don’t Know Nicki Personally…i Haven’t Always Cared For Her Personality As It Can Come Off Quite Plastic (Lol Idc, Judge Your Momma). I’m A Fan Of Her Music, Even The Multiple Personality/Pop Stuff Ya’ll Deemed Outlandish. She’s Undoubtedly The Most Successful Female Rap Artist Of Our Time. I Dig Her Other Pink Friday Albums, But This Album Had Nicki At Her Most Adult (Imo), Vulnerable And Transparent. Of Course, We Know This Album Chronicled Her Simultaneous Breakup With Safaree And New Relationship With Meek Mill. It Doesn’t Get Much Realer Than Breaking Up With Someone You’ve Been With For Over A Decade, Trying To Figure Out Where It Went Wrong All While Fighting To Be “Right” And Simultaneously Falling In Love With/Fearing A New Lover. This Album Came Out In 2014 But Similar To Souled Out, Didn’t Fucking Slap For Me Until 2016-2017.
‘I Lied’ Is About The Fear Of Loving A Man. A Fear Of Being Hurt. That Fear Is So Immense And That Wall Is So High That You Lie In Order To Protect Yourself From Him And Your Feelings. Ya’ll Haven’t Dated Me…but Let Me Assure You, I’m No Walk In The Park. I Have An Unrealistic Fear Of Rejection, I Have Walls That Rival Fort Knox, I Hide Behind Snark And Sarcasm. But Once You Break Through About A Decades Worth Of Ice, There’s That Gooey Ass Center Filled With Sunshine And Forest Animals That You Reach That I’ve Spared No Expense To Protect. Currently, I’m Growing Out Of That. Both In My Building Of New Friendships And Relationships. I’m Trying To Find Balance.
I’m Learning How To Be Myself (Loving, Transparent, Nurturing) While Still Being Able To Establish And Maintain Boundaries. I Have This Terrible Habit Of Going From One Extreme (Ice Queen) To The Other (Naïve Asf). So, I’m Learning From My Last Relationship And Learning From The Music That Helped Me Discover And Define Myself During That Time. This Song Taught Me That It’s Normal To Want To Hide Behind These Walls, But It Hurts More In The Long Run Than It Helps. The Same Walls We Spend Time Hiding Behind Are Often The Exact Walls That Crash Upon Us And Lead To Our Demise (My Game Of Thrones Fans Will Get That One. Cersi’s Bitch Ass Had It Coming Lol).
HONORABLE MENTION : LIMELIGHT X TINK – WINTER’S DIARY 4
So For The People Who Are New To Me, You Shall Soon Learn That No Playlist, Video, Post, Or Musical Mentions Are Complete Until I Bring Up Tink. In My Humble Opinion, She Is One Of Thee Most Underrated Millennial, Woman, Chicago Based Artists…period. Personally, I Believe It’s Because She Doesn’t Fit The Colorism Mold That Runs Rampant In Mainstream Music. I Also Believe It’s Because She’s Another Woman Artist Who Is Unwilling To Bend To The Mainstream And Industry. She’s Released 2 Albums And An Ep And 4 Mixtapes And Every Last Body Of Work Is Epic. She’s A Super Talented Songwriter, An Amazing Singer, And She Can Rap/Freestyle Circles Around Your Fave Anyday. So Yes, Over Here We #ThinkTink Lol
Now, Winter’s Diary 4 Mixtape As A Whole Was Amazing. One Of The Reasons I Love Music So Much Is Because It Describes What I’m Feeling And Going Through When I Literally Can’t Find The Words. This Mixtape Came Out Around The Time I Entered My Longest And Most Serious Relationship. I Had Just Graduated From College, I Had No Clue What I Was Going To Do In Life, I Was Living With Family, My Mom And I Were Yet Again At An Impasse. All Of This Happening While I Was Falling In Love. I Was Entering Into A Relationship Without Having A Clue As To Who I Was And Who I Was About To Become. My Personal Growth And Journey To Self Love Had Just Begun.
‘Limelight’ Is The Intro Track To The Mixtape. Tink Takes On The Role Of The Therapist And The Patient. In The Background, You Can Hear Pencil Scribbling On A Notepad To Replicate A Therapist Writing About Their Patient. She’s Speaking About Entering Into A Relationship (Also Double Entendre For The Music Industry) And The Emotional/Trauma Difficulties She’s Experienced Dealing With Both. Entering A New Relationship While Still Having So Many Walls Up And So Many Doubts And Fears Of Being Hurt, I Felt This Song HEAVY Heavy Baby.
